Babies With No Commitment

Last night Kimbella confirmed that she and Juelz Santana were expected baby #2 less than two years after having baby #1. Congrats to them. The issue I have is that Kimbella was crying over Juelz's infidelity but she decided to give him another child with no marriage and no commitment. This is not going to be a lecture about having kids out of wedlock. This is not even going to be completely about Kimbella, it's going to be about having kids without a commitment.

About four years ago, when I was twenty-one and fresh out of college, one of my former co-workers asked me when I was going to have some kids. Not when I was going to get married or even get a boyfriend, but when was I going to have some kids. I can't remember my response. It was probably about trying to get stable, etc, but the question shocked me. Have we become that accustomed to having kids without stable relationships that it's expected. I can name numerous people who have kids without commitments. I'm not talking about a marriage, I'm talking about a stable relationship, one where mommy and daddy are in a loving and respectful relationship. Juelz and Kimbella's relationship is shaky and he's in jail at the moment. Not to mention that Juelz hasn't been doing too well on the career front. Who would want to subject three children to that? Emily and Fab have a son but no commitment. After ten years, he still won't call her his girlfriend. What's the point in bringing children into that? I have a cousin who has a new baby every time he has a new girlfriend. Some of his babies and girlfriends overlap. That's a problem.

There are too many diseases out there to be having raw sex with someone who knowingly cheats on you. Why push out multiple babies for someone who has no immediate plans for commitment? Back in the day, if a man knocked a woman up, that was his wife for life. Even if he didn't love her, that was his wife. And yes, a lot of women trapped men with babies and still do. In today's culture, where babies out of wedlock is acceptable, that's a tricky move. The man has a moral and financial obligation to the baby but society no longer puts a moral obligation for the woman. I believe there are so many fatherless children out there because the man wasn't planning on the relationship with the woman being long term, so he ties his relationship with the baby to the woman. If he's not with the woman, he's not there for the baby. Wrong, but true. Babies shouldn't come into the world with a job. They shouldn't be born with the job of making daddy commit to mommy, or mommy commit to daddy, or to repair a failing relationship. I want people to be careful with their bodies. If you're going to have sex, then use birth control, a condom, something. Like Steve Harvey says, you know how to get pregnant and you know how not to get pregnant.